When Your Friend One-Ups You

You may know someone like this -- when you share your baby’s latest milestone, she immediately gushes about how her baby did that months ago, or is now walking backwards and upside down. How do you avoid getting into the age-old Mommy and Baby Olympics?

Group of moms and babies

Your baby recently mastered an army crawl. He’s only 5 months old and you are so proud, happy and excited. So you phone your best friend, who has a baby near your little one’s age. Instead of echoing your excitement, she instead brags about her little angel did that when he was only 3 months old and is now taking his first steps. Or, perhaps you posted a status update on Facebook, only to be brought crashing down by a high-school acquaintance whose baby is obviously far more advanced than yours.

Uh … what?

When you had a baby, you likely didn’t expect to partake in any competitions based on his development. Babies have been rolling over, crawling, sitting, pulling up and taking steps since the dawn of time. Each child has his own personal timetable that he’ll follow that is perfect for him.

Doing things earlier than other babies of the same age is just a natural thing for some kiddos -- it doesn’t mean he’s smarter, faster or will succeed any more than his peers who are more content to take a slower pace. Sure, some babies will grow up to be gifted children, but early accomplishments don’t necessarily predict that.

So, what do you do when confronted with a one-up-er?

You have a few choices. Smile, nod and ignore is a good first line of defense. Make a mental note of who you won’t be sharing with in the future and that will help you avoid feelings of hurt or discomfort. You can actually edit your privacy and sharing settings on Facebook and block certain people from your status updates and photos as well, and there is also the ultimate act of avoiding, which is defriending the offending person.

Some people just can’t resist comparing themselves -- or their babies -- to others. You’ll just have to remember to share your baby’s growth and development with those who truly care.

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