Before I was pregnant I'll admit that I was still very interested in the entire 'process' and wondered often what it would be like to pregnant and what life was like for pregnant women.

I read up on pregnancy websites and was always disappointed and bewildered that almost any search on the first trimester usually just brought up information on morning sickness, and how to deal with morning sickness, and how to alleviate morning sickness, and diary journals only continued the mantra with entries related to and complaining about morning sickenss.

I thought how boring it was to spend the first three months of a pregnancy focusing on one single subject. I remember thinking 'Is that all there is to the first trimester?' Not only did I just know that I wouldn't be pregnant when I took that pregnancy test, I knew that if I ever got pregnant I would not make such a big deal out of how sick and pukey I felt in the early months.

Boy am I eating my words, and that is about all I am eating as I can't keep anything else down! My only hope for survival is to eat ice chips until noon, have some soup or something for lunch and that usually stays down until I can get home from work and bury myself into my couch.

Now, every bit of advice I have read says, 'Eat some crackers before you get out of bed,' and 'Eat small meals throughout the day,' but honey, that ain't workin! I've tried that and find my self spinning with nausea and vomiting long after lunch has passed and never end up keeping anything down.

I have read studies before that theorized that many women have morning sickness because they have toxins in their bodies when they get pregnant, and the body is trying to detox in the mornings. When you eat, that inhibits the process and it has been believed for centuries that vomiting is an accelerated attempt the body makes to detox quickly.

Since my body seems to be responding to following this theory, I have to believe that it must be best for me at this point. It's not advice for every body, but it is working for me.

Of course I have to hear the endless negative comments of co-workers and friends (most of whom have never been pregnant) and continually explain that I can eat and immediately throw up, or I can not eat until lunch and then hold down some food. Not only are many of them critical of every move I make, I also have to deal with some peoples down right nasty comments.

My boss, the never failing pessimist comforted me with "Oh honey! This is only the beginning. I puked for 5 months straight, and you probably will too since you're so puny!" By puny she means normal to small framed, unlike her more robust self.

Another co-worker sees me dragging to my cubicle from the bathroom and comments "I can tell you're gonna have a really rough pregnancy." Gee, thanks Mary Sunshine.

The best was when another employee at work went home sick and I, mistakenly, said that I wanted to go home too. My cubicle mate looked at me frowning. "You're not sick. You're just pregnant. This is how you're suppose to be." It is amazing the lack of sympathy most people have toward pregnancy. As if to say, Well, it's your fault you got in this mess, you can suffer through it.

Any employee who had the flu for 3 months would not be expected to perform normally and efficiently at work. But I am trying as I don't think I'll get any breaks soon. So far, at almost 2 months pregnant, I have gained one whole pound and cannot wait until the day when food sounds appealing and tastes good again.

I almost started crying yesterday when my husband ate pasta for dinner and I wished so desperately that I could eat some and not suffer dire consequences!

Not to mention that I believe I have developed some form of lactose intolerance, as my glass of milk the other night had me bent over with stomach cramps and making runs to the restroom half the night. Ah, how glamorous and romantic pregnancy is!

Hopefully only one more month to go until I find some relief :) Come on Trimester 2!


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