I can hardly believe I'm beginning my sixth month. Time certainly is flying. This time of year I always feel like everything moves at an accelerated pace, but I think this year it's going to be even faster. It seriously makes me feel like I need to start crossing some of those projects off my to do list.
But if you can believe it, Jackson woke up with a cold on Wednesday and my body is currently trying to get it. I can't believe my luck with colds this pregnancy. This will be my fourth one. I just can't seem to stay well. I've always had a somewhat weak immune system and having a toddler exposing me to all sorts of things doesn't help.
It also doesn't help that the day he got sick we took an hour and a half nap together (believe me this never happens, but I just passed out on his mattress in his room). I woke to him not even an inch from my face breathing on me and saying, "Hi Mommy." I knew then I was probably just inhaling his little germs. Ahhh, I also think maybe I'm just meant to catch up on some rest right now, but it sure is frustrating not having any energy during the trimester you're supposed to have energy.
This week I wound up only having one true day of Preschool since he was sick the rest of the week. But I have to tell you it was the most surreal feeling to come home and have it so quiet. First I just sat down and ate some cereal and enjoyed doing nothing. Then I made our beds and tidied around the house. It felt so nice to get things done without getting distracted or diverted by toddler needs. I'm looking forward to having these little breaks.
My sister just flew out here yesterday and will be here for the week visiting from New York. She has lived out there since she graduated from college in 1997. However, she announced today that she has decided to move back to California. A lot of things went behind this decision and it's going to be a major life change in every way for her. But I have to say, selfishly I'm really glad that she'll be closer to us to be a more regular part of Jackson and baby Ava's lives. Now she just has to find a place to live, a new job and figure out whether she should pack up a U-Haul and drive cross country or sell everything and start over. She's both excited and a little nervous. I've been praying for things to fall into place for her and hope that she finds all she deserves. I'm excited she'll be so close to us now.
Last time around, the plan was that I'd call her as soon as I went into labor so she could fly out here. She was going to be in there for me with Neal during the delivery. However, my labor went so fast the baby was here before she made it to Los Angeles. Ironically the experience actually made me decide that I liked it being just me and Neal so I think this time around I'll chose to have us on our own, but I definitely will want her to be there for Jackson while I'm in labor.
I forgot to mention that our DSL server was down for two-and-a-half days this week. It about drove me batty not being able to go online. I do everything online from shopping, to research to setting up playdates and following up with work details and scripts. I was seriously going through withdrawals not being able to check my email. Neal says I'm too addicted. But I said, "You try being a stay-at-home-mom without the internet." I honestly do so much on this computer it did make me realize I may be a tad too addicted. But I'm not ready to change that and I'm not sure that I really need to.
Speaking of the internet, one thing I haven't ventured into is ebay, until recently. I had been tracking different 'shabby chic chandeliers' for the baby's room. I didn't want to spend a lot, but I wanted something that would look sweet and have a vintage feel. I actually won an auction for one that cost $50.00. I'm so excited. I just hope it looks as cute in person as it did in the pictures. That's a little scary, not being able to see it in person. I also put in a bid for some vintage baby clothes hangers. I have the christening gowns that I and my grandfather wore. I'd love to hang them up on display, but wanted to find some cute old fashioned hangers. I'll keep you posted if I win that auction as well. It has been kind of fun doing that kind of shopping and feeling like I'm getting a deal.
I continue to feel Ava pushing and tapping and turning and squirming away in there. I know I've said it before, but it feels so much stronger this time around. In general, everything has been more intense the second time around. I was at the car wash the other day and found myself actually jerking a little as I was being jabbed in the hip bone.
I'm so excited that October is almost here. I'll get to see my new OB on the fifth. Next week my mom's bible study starts and on October 4th the new Beth Moore bible study called, "Breaking Free" will start. I'm already aware that I may be taking on too much so I've let people know I'm a little worried about getting all the homework done with everything else on my plate. I'll just do what I can, but I've got to take care of me, the baby and Jackson first.
I forgot to mention I did a job on Sunday covering the Nautica Triathalon in Malibu to raise money for the Elizabeth Glazer Pediatric AIDS Foundation. We covered it for Disney. We had to park quite a distance from the event. It was a two-mile walk there and back, plus six hours on my feet without food. Needless to say I was having quite a lot of tightening that day and the next couple of days. I felt really uncomfortable with a lot of cramping and just felt so tight in my stomach. Then I realized, duh, I'm having Braxton Hicks contractions. They didn't stop until Wednesday when Jackson woke up sick and we both stayed home the entire day. After that I told Neal I think I need to slow down a bit. It seems my body is crying out for me to take it easy. I know it may not sound like that's what I'm doing, but I truly am going to bed early which is really hard for me and I'm saying no to jobs unless they're quick and not a lot of standing.
Hopefully I'll get that burst of energy in the near future and I'll be able to really get the baby's room together. In my head I've done it ten times over already. :) I know I need to just relax and trust that I'll get it done before she's here. However, I won't go into this birth thinking I can finish things up after she's born. With Jackson I was going to do a growth chart mural on the wall too. But he came two-and-a-half weeks early and the pencil outline stayed on that wall for two-and-a-half years, until the room was painted over.
I know I'm going to be so much more realistic about things this time around. I'm thankful for the fact that I don't have to go through the life transitions I did last time. I also think I have a way better perspective on reality. Last time I had nights where I felt like my life would never be back to normal and I'd never stop having to get up at night. Now I know eventually it does even out. I also am going into this accepting that the first year is going to be a lot of juggling. I'm ok with that and hope that since I'm looking at it honestly that I'll be able to enjoy it. I really want to enjoy this baby as a newborn. With Jackson it seems like it's so much a blur I don't remember enjoying it enough.
I've been thinking a lot about how special this time has been for Jackson and me. I'm treasuring every day of it being just the two of us. I know his world is going to be shaken up a bit and I hope he's able to adjust and doesn't resent me too much for being busy with the baby. I just love him so, so much and want him to be happy. He talks about the baby and in the morning will say, "I want to say hi to baby Ava." These things make me smile. He's such a sweetheart and I know he'll be such a great helper and big brother. I'm looking forward to taking pictures of him holding her and kissing her. That image is so sweet to me.
Well, I think that's all on the baby front this week. I hope everyone is doing well. By the way, I didn't cut my hair short, but I did cut about three inches off. It's nice to just have something different and something I may even take the time to blow dry instead of leaving it wet after I shower. I'll have to see in the morning how it really is when I try to style it myself. Goodnight!
Until next time,