One thing you can keep in your bag at all times are mints. If you’re having a hospital birth, and you go into labor early, when you’re not expecting it, at least you’ll have nice fresh breath while you’re there. I know, fresh breath seems tiny compared to labor, but trust me, you’ll like having the mints during labor.

Mints are also easier than brushing your teeth during labor, especially if your gag reflex is touchy. If you hate mint flavor (that would be me) carry orange tic-tacs or fruit candies instead.

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Because many pregnant women go through periods of tiredness, it’s hard to get all that baby gear in one swift swoop. Here’s how to make the most of your shopping time.

Look before you buy: Don’t go to the store and stand in front of the wall of car seats for two hours. Look online, read baby magazines, and learn about various model pros and cons, before you hit the stores. You can find almost any baby item online, most have reviews. Make a list of your research and then go shopping.

Call ahead: Why go into the store if they’re out of three of the four items you need? Call first.

Shop online: Not only can you research online, but you can shop online too. Yay! I do all my holiday shopping this way (I’m not a shopper). A benefit of online shopping is you’re less likely to impulse buy. If you don’t see that cute toy in person, it seems less necessary.  You can also create baby shower registers online at most popular stores.

Be prepared: If you’re shopping for a changing table, measure the baby’s room before you go to the store. If you’ve got 24 newborn outfits, write that down so you don’t buy more newborn clothing. You should also know your measurements if you’re going to the maternity shop.

Start early: This is the number one tip I know for baby shopping. By the final month of pregnancy, I was tired, and no way was I shopping. Seriously, even stock up on basics like diapers early.

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Here’s how to catch some better, more restful zzzzz’s.

Co-sleep: If you co-sleep you can breastfeed in bed. You can comfort your baby without getting up, and you’ll get more sleep overall.

Create a bedtime routine. Even mamas need a routine. Take a warm bath, have some tea, read a book, or play nice music. Get relaxed and you’ll have a better sleep.

Make a list: Don’t lay in bed all night thinking about tomorrow. Instead make a list before bed. Now that you know you won’t forget your tasks, you can sleep.

Exercise: Make sure to get in some exercise every day. You’ll feel better overall and sleep much better.

Naps: If you can’t get enough sleep at night, try a nap in addition to your nighttime sleep.

See a doctor: If you really are having sleep issues, see a health care provider. As a mama you need your rest, and if basic tips and solutions aren’t cutting it, you may have a medical issue to deal with.

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• Ice cold fruit - seriously, frozen organic raspberries are like little icy candies.
• Healthy banana split: Place a banana, some fat-free frozen yougurt, and some dark chocolate shavings in a bowl. Add cherry and eat.
• Freeze one of the following wither in an ice pop mold or bowl: low-fat yougurt, low-fat chocolate milk, low calorie juice, fruit tea, or blended fruit (blend some fruit in the blender, freeze).

To see more read:

Homemade pregnancy ice pops

Icy cold summer lime smoothie

Frozen pickle juice treats for mamas

[Ice pop molds above: Tovolo Star Molds]

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This cute set is an inexpensive solution that will help you organize your baby’s clothing by age. They’re available in green, pink and blue.

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So, is it ok to give some baby gear away? It’s not like you need eighteen receiving blankets. I think so. I think it’s much better to regift some baby gear than to keep stuff you won’t really need. Here are some tips:

1. When you get gifts that you think yu might not use, write who gave it you on a sticky and stick it to the gift. You won’t remember who gave it to you, and it’s not the best idea to regift an item to the person who gave it to you.
2. Consider exchanging rather than regifting. If you can take an item back, and pick up something you really need, like more diapers.
3. Think about who could use your item. Your pregnant friend will likely receive many gifts, a woman’s shelter, or teen parenting program might appreciate your donation more.

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1. Go out with the baby alone - your baby won’t explode if you take her to the store so that your partner can have a break. I promise.
2. Take over some of the feedings - if your partner breastfeeds, maybe talk about pumping some milk, and at night you can handle one or two feedings.
3. Leave work behind - once you go home to spend time with your family, leave the cell at work, turn the computer off, and don’t bring any work home. Once your home, spend time with your partner and baby.
4. Toss one activity out - choose one activity you do each week and drop it. Hang out with your new baby instead.
5. Take over bedtime routines - be in charge of bath time, and getting your baby cuddled and relaxed for sleep.

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I’ve been thinking about this; wondering if society is doing anywhere near a good job preparing men for fatherhood. In my experience no. I’ve been thinking about this double time, because my best girlfriend is leaving her partner of 7 years. They have a 1 1/2 year old baby and this guy doesn’t help at all. He never has. He thinks my best friend (who is breastfeeding), should clean the whole house, do his laundry, cook, take care of his dog, and more, just because she’s there. If my friend and her partner are both at home, and the baby cries, this guy will sit there, playing gaming games and not ever pick her up. It’s insane.

On top of this, he’s whiny when my friend has no time for him, and is super confused about why my friend is leaving him. Trust me, she’s told him all this, he just can’t get it. This is a guy who calls caring for his child “babysitting” A HUGE pet peeve of mine.
In my case, my ex had some major issues that caused me to leave him, but one was the fact that he was so whiny. I have one child, I don’t need another. He complained about me not having enough time for him, but rarely helped out with our son. And frankly, babies come before partners, especially if you get little to no help. I work at home, and even when working my ex expected that I should take care of almost every child issue. My ex never got it either. He pretty much expected me to do baby care, house care, work, and then still fit time with him in. No matter how many times I explained why this was impossible his basic response was, “Huh?”

My ex and my friend’s ex are not the only men I know like this either. Many of my girlfriends have had the same issues. It makes me wonder what’s up. Is there still some unspoken society rule that women should do most of the work in a family?

Have I known good men who do half the work in families - yes, actually more than one. However, the problem males outweigh the good ones I know. Maybe family dynamics is something that needs to be covered more frequently in education and the media.

Ok, vent over - what’s your experience? Do you do more work in all areas of life than your partner? OR are tasks equally split, and if so why do you think this is.

Next post: a list you can hand your partner about ways he can be more involved with his baby.

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Baby girl: Fern; from the Old English, fearn, a flowerless plant with large, feathery, green fronds. Popular at the end of the last century.

Baby boy: Habakkuk; a name that appears only in the Bible, and later taken up by Methodists in Wales.

I really like the name Fern. It’s simple, pretty, and nice and chill. I knew a Fern in Highschool who was super nice, and the only issue I have is the whole Charlotte’s Web deal. However, I would consider this name for a child. Habakkuk - um, no.

What do you think of these names?  

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Mix age groups: Even young babies can benefit from playing with babies of varying ages.

Limit alone time: Babies should have some alone time, but too much is not cool for babies who tend to base a lot of their social growth on imitation, and other human interactions.

Allow emotions: Allowing, or accepting all the different emotional ranges your baby shows is smart. Self expression within limits is something all humans need to learn.

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