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Melissa Leonard

Your question:
How do I tell my mother-in-law that I don't want her at my birth? We get along well -- I just consider this a private event.

The expert answers:
I second that! Some people don't mind if family and friends gather round to see the big event. Personally, I wouldn't want others to see me in that position... literally.

First, find out the hospital policy. Many hospitals do not allow more than one person in the birthing room at a time. If this is the case, you would naturally want your husband to be in the room with you.

If the hospital does not have a policy, have a conversation with your spouse, and then sit down with your mother-in-law. Let her know that although you understand her desire to be in the room during the birth of her grandchild, you have both decided that you would feel more comfortable if no family was in the room. She may accept this answer or she may not. But, not to worry -- it is your decision and that is final. If your mother-in-law has hurt feelings, that's a shame, but so be it. She is not giving birth, you are! During labor and delivery, your focus will be on counting, breathing and pushing. When your baby arrives, you will only have a little while to share in this special time before the baby goes off to get weighed and cleaned -- before being placed into your arms once again.PregnancyAndBaby.com

Tags: private

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