Sex can be tricky. It’s fun and exciting, but it doesn’t always go as smoothly as you’d like it to. To help you avoid unnecessary awkwardness and make the most of your experience, we put together some tips for what not to say or do in bed.
Don’t complain about your body
The last thing anyone wants to hear in the heat of the moment, or when they’re trying to get things going in the bedroom, is how much you wish you had bigger boobs or smaller thighs. Not to mention, if you’re focusing on what you dislike about your body, you’re clearly not enjoying the moment. Even if you feel self-conscious about your body, there’s no need to vocalize your insecurities or point out things you perceive as flaws. Instead, focus on having fun and feeling good.
Don’t lie about what you like
While he may be thrilled with a new move he’s come up with, if you aren’t thrilled with the results, don’t tell him you are. That will just set you up for more of what you don’t enjoy. If he thinks he’s done something you loved, he’s very likely to add it to his regular repertoire and then where will you be? Rather than risk dealing with a lackluster move, tell him you appreciate the effort and willingness to try new things but the “tilt-a-whirl” just wasn’t your thing.
Don’t fake it
There are times when it just happens — you don’t plan to fake it, but the timing just didn’t work out and you make all the right sounds and then you’re back on the couch watching Breaking Bad. We get it; it happens to the best of us. But faking pleasure on the regular can cause huge problems down the road, and even deeply hurt your partner when they realize they really haven’t been giving you what you want in bed. If something isn’t working, talk about it, and if you need to, get some professional help in the form of therapy to see what issues are hindering your orgasm.
Don’t do anything you’re not comfortable with
Even if he’s really excited about trying something that you’re just not into, don’t do something you aren’t comfortable with just to please your partner. If you give in, you’re likely to feel awkward and have trouble relaxing, which will make for a frustrating experience for both of you. If it’s something you’d consider trying, but you’re not ready yet, work up to whatever it is slowly and at a pace that works for you.
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